Friday, March 26, 2010

Caring for an Elderly Parent or Friend - Guest Post and Giveaway

Now that many of my friends and I are in our 40s or 50s, the reality of caring for older parents is becoming a fact of life for some of us.  When Candi Wingate, President of, offered to write a guest post for my blog, I asked her if she would write on this topic.  I hope you'll find it relevant.

Many families with elder care-giving responsibilities can find those responsibilities both a blessing (to care for the beloved elders) and a curse (heart-wrenching at times, beyond the families’ skill level at times, and always a scheduling challenge). Perhaps you’re care-giving for your terminally ill mother. What a wonderful opportunity to get to know her and bond with her in a whole new way . . . and to reciprocate the care-giving she gave you when you were small. But the joy of raising a child is not parallel to the pain of watching your mother die, and you may not have all the skills that you need to render her in-home medical care. And what do you do about your job?

Some families would love to be able to provide care-giving for their elderly loved ones, but circumstances (such as geography) prevent that. What do you do if your terminally ill father lives in Detroit; and you, your spouse, and your small children live in New York City?

Whether you hire an elder caregiver who works full-time, part-time, or as a respite caregiver, there are many benefits to bringing in these loving professionals.

* If the elderly person does not have any family member nearby, a caregiver can act in place of the family to attend to the needs of the elderly person.

* If the elderly person has a family member nearby, but that family member does not have the time to commit to care-giving, a caregiver can act in the place of the family to attend to the needs of the elderly person.

* If the elderly person has a family member nearby, but that family member doesn’t have the necessary skills, training, or emotional capability, a caregiver can supplement the care-giving provided by the family member(s) who is/are attending to the elderly person.

* If the elderly person has family nearby that meets many of his/her needs, but the elderly person prefers to have an elder companion for an additional interpersonal connection, a caregiver can provide that supplemental companionship.

* If the family member(s) who hold(s) the primary elder caregiver responsibilities needs respite (a temporary break to regroup from the stressful work of care-giving for the beloved elders), a respite caregiver can be hired to absorb the care-giving responsibilities for a specified period of time (the period of respite).

For these and other reasons, hiring an elder caregiver may be right for your family. There are a variety of traits and skills that you may seek in an elder companion / caregiver. A brief list follows.

* patience

* tact

* kindness

* empathy

* emotional stability

* discretion

* honesty

* trustworthiness

* dependability

* good communication skills

* ability to follow directions

* ability to respond well to constructive criticism

* ability to handle stressful situations well

* ability to work independently

* ability to multitask

* ability to problem solve

* ability to provide transportation for self and elder

* ability to monitor and record physical and mental functioning of elder

* ability to administer medications and perform medical-related services for elder

* interest in the elder, his/her life and stories, what he/she thinks, and how he/she feels

* liability insurance to cover professional errors, etc.

* certification by the National Association for Home Care and Hospice

You may not need your elder companion / caregiver to possess all these qualifications (i.e., the ability to administer medications). There may be other qualifications that you seek in an elder companion / caregiver instead. However, the list above is a general list that most families use in the "typical" situation in which an elder companion / caregiver is hired.

It will be helpful for you to write an elder caregiver job description: doing so helps clarify expectations for you, the elder, and the elder caregiver. If possible, include the elder in the interviews of the prospective elder caregivers: doing so is an important step to securing the elder’s acceptance of his/her new caregiver. After interviewing the candidates who best mirror your desired traits, skills, and credentials, background checks are in order. Then, you’re ready to extend a job offer to your one best candidate.

We at are here to help you find the right caregiver for your family. We can even help you perform background checks. We are here to serve you. is an online database for families and caregivers to search babysitters, housekeepers, tutors, elder/companion care, pet sitters and other miscellaneous service. A free preview of available caregivers is available to families. Whether you need a caregiver for a few hours to a few days, you will find it at Once you are a registered member, you will be given immediate access to caregiver through email and phone.

Thanks to Candi and, one lucky Frugal Creativity reader will win a free membership to  This prize is in the form of a Gift Certificate for a free membership ($34.99 retail value) to; this gives you 1 month to login and contact caregivers.

Here's how to enter:  Visit the Care4hire blog, then come back here and share something you learned. Be sure to leave a way for me to contact you. Limit 1 entry by this method. This must be done in order to qualify for extra entries.

Here's how you can earn additional entries (please leave one comment per entry):
  • Follow both me and Care4hire on Twitter and tweet about this giveaway.  You may use this or write your own: RT @FC_Melissa Win a free membership from @care4hire! ) Leave a link to your tweet. (1 entry per day)
  • Enter this giveaway in another blog's current giveaway linky list. Leave a comment here with a link to the post. (3 entries - mention Entry #1, Entry #2, Entry #3)
  • Subscribe to my feed in a feed reader. If you already subscribe, leave a comment to let me know. (2 entries - mention Entry #1 and Entry #2)
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  • Follow my blog on Google Friend Connect. (2 entries - mention Entry #1 and Entry #2)
  • Blog about this giveaway with a link back to this post. Leave a comment with a link to your blog post. (5 entries - mention Entry #1, Entry #2, Entry #3, etc.)
  • Add my blog to your text blogroll, and send me a link to your blog. (2 entries - mention Entry #1 and Entry #2)
  • Comment on a non-giveaway post on my blog. (1 entry per post commented - limit 5 total)
  • Enter another giveaway on my blog. (1 entry per giveaway)
More details: Open to residents of USA, age 18 or older.  Giveaway ends 4/12/10 at noon (Eastern time). Winner will be chosen by the random number generator at Winner will be contacted by email and must claim the prize within 48 hours, or another winner will be chosen. Void where prohibited.

Disclosure: I have received no compensation in any form for hosting this giveaway.

MckLinky Blog Hop


  1. That is SUCH an important job...Thank goodness there are caring people who can do it. Following you from McLinky FF.

    Blessings to you today!


  2. Thank you so much for the great post. We look forward to helping families find the right eldercare for their family.


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